A no-nonsense read that is beyond the beauty norms built by the society.
Nothing wrong if you stumbled upon this piece while looking for pro-tips on scoring that crush of yours, but hate to break it to you (not!), none of the tricks here include any overnight solutions to achieving that hot-bod. We are not discussing how to get good looks that someone would gush over day and night. This piece goes below the surface, rattling phenomena that subconsciously make us attracted to those over others. And no, this is not limited to heterosexual attraction, but beyond that, looking deeper into relationships, like the ones we have with colleagues, mentors, even friends.
A lot of people complain that they’re misunderstood to be unapproachable; we ourselves have been guilty of judging others as stuck up before even having the first conversation. Being approachable is not just having a personality of being open; rather a subconscious intent to be inviting. Consciously keeping an open body language, wearing a neutral smile and when someone actually does approach, being totally present to what they’re saying, are sure to up your people quotient.
Don’t engage in gossip
Even if it’s true, do not be a part of the vine. Encouraging foul talk make the vulnerable turn down the idea of dealing with you. If you have an opinion about someone or if you’ve been hurt or let down with an action, take it to the said person instead of confining into someone else. This makes you look legit and confident, and confident is directly proportional to attractiveness.
Don’t hide your quirks
Get rid of the social niceties and truly be you. Our fear for being judged as weird makes us boring. Don’t fall in the trap of wearing a persona with an intention of being liked. The world knows subconsciously we all have unique ideas, secret desires but we keep them hidden because we are scared of judgment. It’s actually the other way around, those who own their quirks are seen as most attractive in the room.
Ever heard a lazy person talk? They are most likely to pass the buck (responsibility) of not only tasks but also their own opinions and thoughts. The more proactive you are the more interesting people will find you. Think of a conversation where only one is doing the asking, one replying with only ended responses. Be interested in others to be perceived as interesting, bottom line.
Ditch Auto-pilot social scripts
Ask interesting questions and you will be rewarded with interesting conversations. The “How do you do?” and the “What do you do?” can be replaced with “What are your goals, passions?” or ask their opinion on a trending topic or if it interests them at all.
Being more self-aware and mindful of actions and words exude confidence. Mastering the art of being confidence and kind, without bragging or self obsessing is sure to make you the most attractive in a room. Simpler to-dos compared to self-sabotaging appearance mending techniques.